hejira

Sunyata

2011-03-27T19:37:00.001-05:00

The Potential Of Sunyata or Emptiness

Sunyata is a Sanskrit word that is generally translated into English as emptiness. Sunyata is the noun form of the adjective "sunya" which means "empty" or "void" (derived from the root "svi", meaning "swollen"), plus -ta -ness, making empty (- ness) or voidness. The idea behind the word makes reference to unbounded openness or a hollow or womb pregnant with unlimited potential. The latent energy referenced by the word Sunyata is particularly poignant as the year draws to a close and we prepare to begin a new cycle. In eastern thought the idea of emptiness is tied closely to the cultivation of insight, wisdom and ultimately inner peace. Sunyata signifies the flux or dynamic impermanence inherent in all things while simultaneously exposing the inter-related or interdependent nature of being. For me personally the idea of emptiness is powerful because it brings to mind the potential for transformation. Like an empty container waiting to be filled, the mind, when void of thought, has the potential to hold any possibility. The end of a cycle or the beginning of a new year are powerful times to let go of what no longer serves us and create the space for what lies ahead. Cultivating emptiness for me is about walking the edge between where I have been and where I want to go next. In yoga, sunyata, is signified by the moment when we have exhaled completely, and before we take the next breath. It is a space of great lightness and serenity between the actions of coming and going. Although we are constantly moving in and out of this space we don't often allow our awareness to fully rest in this space. The end of the year is an excellent time to reflect on emptiness as we resolve to relinquish old patterns and take steps to commit to a more fulfilling future.

"I think about that "empty" space a lot. That emptiness is what allows for something to actually evolve in a natural way. I've had to learn that over the years - because one of the traps of being an artist is to always want to be creating, always wanting to produce" -Meredith Monk

The Falcom Hears The Falconer

2011-03-27T19:37:00.000-05:00

From the continued meltdown of the financial sector to the trillions spent on bailouts and stimulus packages, foreclosures, Ponzi schemes, death panels, incessant talk of healthcare reform, homegrown terrorists, H1N1 hype and the death of Michael Jackson, 2009 has felt like a very long meandering drive down a poorly maintained, winding mountain road in the dark. One word stands out in my mind...calamity. For a time it seemed that calamity indeed loomed around the next corner and as a culture we were holding our collective breath. I know millions of Americans faced real calamity in the loss of job and home, mounting bills, and limited options. This has been a tough year on many fronts. I don’t think this truth would be denied by many.

As the end of this interesting year draws to a close, the mantra, I’m still here, has been bubbling to the surface. This seems particularly important to me lately because I know that during particularly high periods of emotional stress or when faced with anxiety-provoking realities, it is all too easy to dissociate from the space of inner peace and fortitude. It is even harder to hold onto a sense of calm deliberation when we have a personal history of drama and being reactive. Personally, I think we have been slogging our way through a fairly intense chapter of collective angst that no amount of “positive thinking” could ameliorate. There has been unprecedented change in a very short stretch of time and for many of us the resultant landscape has changed substantially.

Whether you believe that the change we have experienced over the last 12 months (and more) is going to make us stronger or that it’s a sign of a slow but inevitable decline, is irrelevant to me because today, this very moment, in every breath, I’m still here. This may sound simple but the essential quality that I know and embrace as seminally John, hasn’t changed as a result of all the external turmoil. I think we often forget this simple truth. As a result, we begin to feel lost or adrift in the turmoil. In repeating this mantra, I’m still here, to myself over the last weeks and months, I have found space to exhale and relax into the potential of what lies ahead. The alternative is to lose oneself in the drama, curling back into a place of greater fear and anxiety. I think the benefit of staying present during such difficult times is somewhat obvious. On one hand, we can better marshal the energy necessary to address obstacles and challenges. Perhaps more importantly, we increase the likelihood that we will stay present through the gorgeous sunsets spent with a partner, laughter of a child or aimless play of a beloved pet.

Yoga taught me the mantra, I’m still here. To stand on my hands, meditate for hours, balance on one foot, flow continuously for an hour or stay in a headstand for 5 minutes required that I believe in myself and tap into that bottomless well of inner calm and integrity. Despite what at times, seems like struggle or turmoil, I’m still here in each breath and every moment. Noting that the external may have shifted, while reconnecting with that timeless, limitless, spaceless quality of consciousness is why we are here. Yoga reminds me that even amongst the stressful periods, there is always the potential for creative play.

Rediscovering Inspiration

2011-03-27T19:36:00.000-05:00

Anything that we do on a regular basis can begin to feel stale after a while. Anyone that has been in a relationship can attest to this. The energy that ignites the spark in a friendship or romantic relationship can grow cold with time. Sometimes we lose sight of what it was that generated our interest in the first place; other times we take aspects of our loved one for granted. We may also become distracted and stop putting as much effort into staying connected. Whatever the reason, what once seemed exciting or even exhilarating begins to feel...dissatisfying or dull. The same is true for our yoga practice. If we fail to align our intentions and rediscover our passion, our yoga practice can become as stale and sour as a carton of expired milk.

It is not uncommon for people to stop yoga or look for a new teacher as their interest wanes. Obviously there is nothing inherently wrong with this approach. However, it is possible to rekindle your enthusiasm for your daily practice by asking a few simple questions.

What excited me about yoga to begin with?
When did I get too comfortable and lose my focus?
Do I practice yoga to soothe myself or to purify myself?

Doing the work necessary to stay inspired with a daily ritual like yoga usually means that we need to work on changing our approach and allowing ourselves to be uncomfortable again. I say again, because most of us experienced periods of discomfort and resistance as new students. Challenging ourselves to be uncomfortable pushes us to stay alert and engaged in the process. The discomfort doesn’t need to be extreme, in fact, it can be as simple as trying a new class, revisiting the basics in an intro class or jumping into that level 3 practice on Saturday morning. If we only do what we’re comfortable with, then we are never pushing ourselves to grow beyond our current energy state, and what is the result? Boredom.

Another effective tool is setting goals. All too often we fall into the trap of feeling like we have done it before, so how could it be different this time around? Even though we know that every day is different and every practice has its unique challenges, we still get lulled by the day-in, day-out repetition of a regular practice. Maybe instead of being content to stay in our backbend for five breaths, we set our sights on staying up for 30 or 40 or 60. Perhaps it is learning how to take the shape of a new posture or be still in a longer meditation. Whatever the challenge, goals can help us refocus and rediscover lost enthusiasm and interest.

Finally we need to make space for balance in our practice. This is something I learned very early in my life as a swimmer. Both the body and mind respond with renewed vigor to variation. In other words, if we only engage in vigorous yoga practices we may not be giving ourselves the opportunity to experience the equally important equanimity that can emerge from long periods of stillness in seated meditation. Balance is essential to maintaining a longterm practice and without it we can easily become to attached to a single approach. By balancing motion with stillness in the larger context of our overall practice we double or triple our opportunity for finding a fresh, invigorating perspective.

Staying engaged in anything over the longterm takes effort. The question we all need to ask is how much are we willing to commit to ourselves, our personal power and our inner wellbeing. Yoga is about tuning into the deepest core elements of our psyche over a lifetime. We never arrive at our destination; we are always seekers on the path. The challenge is to remain hungry and to continue to seek out those opportunities for greater self-awareness both on and off the mat.

Suffering For Compassion

2011-03-27T19:35:00.000-05:00

Several years ago I took a group on a retreat to Costa Rica. During one of the group discussions, the issue of suffering emerged as a topic. It was fascinating to witness how difficult it was for the majority of participants to “admit” that they experienced meaningful suffering in their day-to-day lives. Many students only seemed capable of defining suffering in terms of issues like poverty or disease in third-world countries. For them it was as if the day-to-day struggles of being human weren’t credible examples of “true” suffering. I suppose this type of attitude isn’t difficult to fathom when one considers that we live in a society that idolizes the glamor of celebrities and athletes alike, and worships at the feet of youth and beauty. Suffering in all its many forms is fairly mundane and certainly not particularly chic.
The commonplace quality of suffering is what makes it so important and powerful. We all suffer and sometimes that suffering is striking in its magnitude – for example, terminal illness or the loss of a loved one. More often our suffering is more subtle in nature, emerging through the existential thingness of being a human – loneliness, fear of growing old, social anxiety, etc. Rich or poor, celebrity or Haitian orphan, we ALL suffer. To claim that we don’t suffer is like saying that we are somehow remarkably immune from being human. In so many ways suffering is one of the common threads that binds us together as humans regardless of location, age, station or class.
To admit that we suffer is to accept that we are just like everyone else, no better, no worse. More importantly, allowing oneself to work with suffering “is a tremendous affirmation that there is no need to resist being fully in this world, that we are in fact part of the web.”* Suffering, in all its forms, is the road to compassion and can lead to greater understanding and inner peace. Many spiritual teachers knew this; you need look no further than the teachings of Buddha or Christ for examples of how coming to terms with suffering can alter the landscape of self-awareness. The point I’m trying to make isn’t that we should all collapse into a heap and bemoan our existence. My point is that if we deny or try to avoid suffering, we are effectively cutting ourselves off from one of the most essential qualities of our humanity and in turn limiting our ability to connect with a partner, child, friend, or stranger. Suffering doesn’t have to be a negative particularly when we reframe it in the context of connecting compassionately to other people. Compassion and suffering are intimately bound together in what it means to be a conscious human. Denying suffering within ourselves is to deny our basic humanity.

The Big Questions

2011-03-27T19:34:00.000-05:00

There was a time, early on in my spiritual development, when I thought there might be answers to the big questions presented by the serendipity of a conscious mind. As an adolescent the BIG questions, for me, perpetually centered around my own mortality. It wasn’t necessarily the death of my physical body that disturbed me so much as it was the existential crisis presented by the emptiness seemingly inherent in ceasing to be conscious. I just couldn’t wrap my mind around why/how we humans were blessed and cursed with the awareness of our own mortality.

Looking back, I can see how my unusual childhood tuned me to this sometimes dark fascination which was further amplified by an inherently artistic temperament. By my late teens and early twenties, I was primed to spend a large portion of my energy as an adult seeking answers, looking for truths and generally being earnest. I explored the problem from a variety of angles, imbibing various substances in an attempt to dissolve the self imposed barriers between me and everything else. I resolved to fight a pitched battle to unlock my chest and hips through hours of asana practices. I meditated alone and in groups, for hours and sometimes days, staring into the eyes of another human. I repeated my mantra and chanted or sang with passion. I read the sacred texts, the histories and philosophies, the self help books and the reflections of great minds. In short I searched in earnest.

More than two decades later, I haven’t found The Answer and more than once I have cast about in confusion, wondering what it is I am searching for. After all this time, with no apparent goal in sight, I can’t help but wonder from time to time at the futility of my efforts. This isn’t to say that there haven’t been great benefits to all this effort. There certainly have been, but most of them are as transitory as the seasons. Most profoundly and possibly importantly, I no longer feel the existential angst as deeply.

So the questions remain but so to do the lessons. The most lasting lesson has been the realization that all the striving and searching we do as humans to have the answers, to garner ownership over this fleeting experience we call a life, is just another form of grasping and attaching. Although the searching we do is perhaps somewhat more ephemeral than our attachment to external things, the end result or the net effect on us energetically is the same - tangible or intangible, in the end we must release it all.

My searching will continue, not because I believe I will ever find the answer, rather because I see now that being blessed with consciousness means being entangled in living. We are forever grasping and releasing, grasping and releasing. Living is poignantly beautiful and distressing all in one breath. There is no answer to this predicament. Regardless of chaos or the promise of a bright future, life looms before us and demands to be lived. I don’t know about you but I will likely continue to cling and become attached. I will also continue to celebrate the practices like yoga and meditation, running, swimming, walking, loving, nature, dogs, etc. that cultivate a lasting sense of peace within me.

Yoga Is My Church

2011-03-27T19:08:00.000-05:00

What moves us, what inspires us, what in our experience of life provides us with the spark to transcend? No matter how much or how little we have, the inherent repetition of life can dull our appreciation for its singular beauty. Sometimes we are jarred awake by tragedy or catastrophe and become painfully aware of living in the present. Other times the majesty of nature or the deep sense of belonging when we are connected to others, provides us with the spiritual nourishment we need to stay inspired. Rather than pointing us toward experiences that encourage a wider and deeper perspective, the consumer culture of today reinforces acquisition of things as both the primary activity and meaning behind existence. The result is a kind of spiritual bankruptcy or at the very least a kind of cultural dysthymia. As a society, we over-work and over-eat and generally reach for anything that will stave off the boredom or emptiness.

Last summer I had the distinct pleasure of walking through several old European cathedrals. As I crossed the threshold into each and every one of them I was struck by how the din and chaos in the world outside faded into the background. Believe what you will of Christianity but they absolutely understood the inherent need within all of us for an inner sanctum and how to tune the mind to that space through light, architecture and iconography. As I sat in the pews of Sacré Cœur in Paris I was moved and inspired, not because I have some need to be saved by god with a capital G, but rather because I was reminded that the meaning (with a capital M) is within all of us all the time. It helps to sit in silence before a gorgeous stained glass rose window, but whatever the catalyst, finding peace and deeper meaning expressed externally through art or music or nature is essential. Ritual in all its forms is a powerful force in every life. It can produce both rapture and discontent. I have often said that for me personally yoga as ritual is my cathedral or church. The sometimes halting, sometimes graceful movement of my body through space makes it possible to better align my mind to the hearts fluidity...thereby making my internal space an external expression. What is your yoga practice? How do you find inspiration?

John Merideth - Aerial Sequence #1

2010-04-27T02:45:00.000-05:00

Mixing Rest With Motion - The benefits of interval training

2010-02-12T00:22:00.000-05:00

Recently the CDC released research into the trend towards obesity in both adults and children in the USA ( cdc - http://jama.ama-assn.org/cgi/content/full/2009.2014). The prevalence of obesity has been steadily increasing in the USA since the mid-1970’s. Today more than a third of the population is battling obesity and its associated illnesses of heart disease, diabetes and other metabolic disorders. It is common knowledge that exercise can have a profound effect on weight loss, controlling blood glucose and reducing triglyceride levels in the blood. Some recent research is showing that interval training, intense sprint sets followed by brief rest sets, can kick start a stalled metabolism and make a good workout regimen even more efficient and effective.

The idea behind interval training is to alternate effortful short burst activities with short, slower recovery periods. Interval training has been used by professional athletes to improve performance for decades. Modern research is indicating that these fast-slow workouts with steep peaks and valleys can dramatically improve cardiovascular fitness and generally increase the body’s potential to burn fat.

Studies published in the Journal of Applied Physiology and research performed at McMaster University in Hamilton, Ontario found that interval training doubled the endurance of test subjects, increased the amount of fat burned during moderate exercise by 36% and increased cardiovascular fitness by 13%. By comparison, volunteers in the control group not doing interval training, but who did engage in regular moderate exercise, didn’t see similar benefits. Even more striking is that the overall fitness of subjects didn’t change the benefits of interval training. Borderline sedentary subjects and college athletes alike had similar increases in fitness and fat burning from interval training.

The idea behind interval training makes a great deal of sense. When we work hard or when we confuse our muscles by exposing them to a novel exercise, the body is forced to access new muscle fibers. Accessing unused muscle fibers means that the we are tapping into new energy reserves. The benefit here is twofold. First, once activated, these newly engaged muscles fibers will now be trained and available to burn fuel even when we are doing less intense activity. Second, these newly activated muscle fibers stimulate the mitochondria, the energy centers in cells, encouraging them to convert more fuel into energy and causing them to burn fat first. This change takes place across all exercise we do, even during lower intensity workouts!

Lasting benefit can be achieved from interval training by adding only a single session to your weekly workout regimen. If your interested in experimenting with interval training we will be starting two classes at onlYoga on Tuesdays beginning February 16th - 6 - 6:30pm & 6:45 - 7:15pm. Everyone is welcome. The cost is $10 to drop-in, free for unlimited students. See you there!

The Big Questions

2009-09-17T13:56:00.000-05:00

Yoga and Your Health

2008-05-13T22:45:00.001-05:00

Effects of Hatha Yoga Practice on the Health-Related Aspects of Physical Fitness
Ten healthy, untrained volunteers (nine females and one male), ranging in age from 18–27 years, were studied to determine the effects of hatha yoga practice on the health-related aspects of physical fitness, including muscular strength and endurance, flexibility, cardiorespiratory fitness, body composition, and pulmonary function read more...

Studies show yoga has multiple benefits
Yoga induces a feeling of well-being in healthy people, and can reverse the clinical and biochemical changes associated with metabolic syndrome read more...

To Stretch or Not to Stretch? The Answer Is Elastic
The truth is that after dozens of studies and years of debate, no one really knows whether stretching helps, harms, or does anything in particular for performance or injury rates read more...

38 Ways Yoga Keeps YOU Fit! "Yoga.Journal"
As it happens, Western science is starting to provide some concrete clues as to how yoga works to improve health, heal aches and pains, and keep sickness at bay read more...

Yoga May Aid Body Image, Cut Eating Disorders
Yoga may make women feel better about their bodies, steering them away from eating disorders, a new study shows read more...

Exercise and yoga improves quality of life in women with early-stage breast cancer
Two studies report that exercise and yoga can help maintain and in some cases improve quality of life in women with early-stage breast cancer read more...

The Role Flexibility Plays In Improving Your Health
Increased flexibility provides you with a number of health benefits. When you are more flexible, you feel better. Your body works better. You are less likely to become injured. You can exercise without discomfort and without getting too sore the next day read more...

A randomised comparative trial of yoga and relaxation to reduce stress and anxiety
Yoga appears to provide a comparable improvement in stress, anxiety and health status compared to relaxation read more...

Sensory Integration Laboratory
Sensory defensiveness is a larger reaction to and less tolerance of typical levels of sound, touch, smell, lights, and movement in the environment that most others would find harmless read more...

Say 'Om.' Yoga and other therapies good for chronic pain, study says
Researchers reviewed 20 clinical trials involving eight mind-body therapies for adults who suffered from chronic, non-malignant pain, to assess their feasibility, effectiveness in pain management and safety.The findings are published in Volume 8 of the journal Pain Medicine read more...

Health, Hope and HIV
"Healing does not come only out of little bottles, as many people want it to," says Jon Kaiser, M.D., a San Francisco HIV specialist and author of Healing HIV: How to Rebuild Your Immune System (HealthFirst Press, 1998). "Healing comes from inside. That's why I strongly recommend that patients with HIV take time each day to practice deep relaxation. Yoga quiets the mind, improves breathing and circulation, and reduces stress. Daily practice can help support the immune system in conjunction with a comprehensive HIV treatment program." read more...

Begin Again

2008-05-13T22:43:00.001-05:00

With the start of a new year it is important to restate the intention or meaning behind the practice of ashtanga yoga. The practice is meant to sharpen the razor of discrimination. With sustained practice we develop razor-like attention that can be used to slice through karmic attachments both latent and active. The discrimination developed enables one to see through the four primary forms of ignorance, these are: 1) confusing the temporary for the eternal, 2) mistaking the impure for the pure, 3) experiencing misery as happiness, and 4) believing that the limited ego self is the true Self. Essentially discrimination allows for subtler forms of introspection which in turn shed light on why we suffer. The first five stages or limbs of yoga hone the razor edge of discrimination, these are: yama, niyama, asana, pranayama, pratyahara. The final three stages or limbs of yoga put the finely sharpened tool of discriminating awareness into action allowing for direct unbiased experience. Yoga, much like modern day psychology, is a systematic method for understanding the perceptual flow of the mind. At its most basic level, discrimination is a process of sorting this from that. The sorting process usually begins at the most primary level with our relationship to the external world. We begin to develop discrimination as we practice principles such as non-injury, truthfulness, compassion and contentment.

Q and A

2007-09-26T10:51:00.001-05:00

Q: Why don’t you talk philosophy more when you teach? Don’t you think it would be helpful to give students an idea of what they should be focusing on or thinking about while they are practicing?

A: A Yoga practice is like a Rorschach inkblot test in action. It is important to give students plenty of time to really sink into the thickness of their own thoughts. As they do this they will project a great deal of their own internalized struggle and resistance onto the experience (the practice). If a teacher is always “proselytizing” or espousing beliefs, then students will ultimately not have the “thinking” space to befriend their own mind and gain a deeper understanding of their own very personal mental habituation. Simply put, there is a significant difference between having someone tell us we are stuck, or being reactive, versus reaching that conclusion in our own time. We are far more likely to take ownership over our own realizations! I also believe that most of us tend towards taking life far too seriously and we bring that limitation with us onto our mat. We turn our yoga practice into another way to avoid the sometimes heartbreaking inconsistencies and injustices of being mortal humans. I believe that learning to truly be uncomfortable and...make it through to the other side of that discomfort is a big part of what yoga has to teach us. Having someone croon dogmatic pleasantries while we are attempting to pull our senses inward seems counter intuitive at best, if not wholly egocentric. What about inspiration? One of the most profound concepts I was ever exposed to in my life is that motivation comes from within. A good teacher learns to step out of the way so that students are able to find their own inner cheerleader.

This isn’t to say that the philosophy of yoga is unimportant. Certainly it is possible to fill in some of the shadows cast by one's own mind and gain a much deeper understanding of the overall yoking process by slogging through an original source like the Yoga Sutras. However, unlike other philosophies, yoga is relevant only to the degree we are willing and able to put its ideas into action in our practice. It is primarily for this reason that I continue to practice Ashtanga yoga, it is philosophy in action and in many respects an artful recipe for living a rich and delicious life.

-John Merideth • Director and Owner of onlYoga

Swim Smart

2007-09-26T10:51:00.000-05:00

Swim Smart

Stepping to the front of the mat and attempting to surrender to the idea that for the next 90 minutes we are going to practice "relaxing effort" can present something of a conundrum in our practice. Since yoga is at least in part a physical experience we often assume that without struggle we wont reap its many flaunted benefits. So we hold on tight, contract our mental muscles and launch ourselves into the "work" of making it happen. Instead of floating, we bang and stumble our way from one practice to the next. I refer to this as the "hard work" paradigm and it is mostly about affirming what we already know about our physical experience? Since the effort we exert sometimes allows us to muscle our way through yoga postures that seemed unreachable a few months ago, this paradigm can be difficult to shake. Inevitably though we hit a plateau and begin to wonder why we are working so hard all the time. We begin to wonder if this is it...and for some of us it is. We have simply affirmed what we already knew - our bodies are finite structures.
When I was swimming competitively one of my coaches, Jack Nelson, used to go on and on about how important it was to swim smart. He employed many “fascinating” techniques to make his point (most of which ended with a fairly large portion of the team treading water). I thought I understood his point then but it wasn't until I began suffering through my yoga practice a few years later that his words really clicked into place. “Muscles can help you float or they can drag you down. Brute strength and effort don’t win a race. Efficiency and awareness can make a mediocre swimmer great. Swim smart!”
In life we often approach a situation with our full compliment of attachments, habits and preconceptions about who we are and how we are. Before we say a single word, take a single breath or make our first move we have predetermined the outcome of the experience. Pema Chodron calls it our story line - the self-perpetuating tale we weave to maintain the status quo. Relaxing effort means that we allow the story line and its limiting internal definitions to fall away. Essentially we attempt to move or love or breath or eat or work with intelligence. The key to this form of intelligent action is nonjudgmental observation. We watch, we notice and we make small adjustments that keep us asking questions about where we are. The real practice then is in learning how to allow the experience to live us so that ME stops getting in the way. I have found over the years that intelligent action can infuse an otherwise stale, flat practice with new life and tons of fresh energy. Suddenly we are like children again curiously exploring and playing through what we previously identified as “work”. So the next time you step to the front of your mat don't try so hard to be who you think you are, instead relax the effort and swim smart!

Namaste • John Merideth • Director onlYoga

Light - The God Of Generosity

2007-09-26T10:50:00.001-05:00

Light - The God Of Generosity
For longer than recorded history, native cultures living in the northern hemisphere have recognized that December brings with it ever increasing darkness. The days grow steadily colder and shorter and the age old drama in the war of light against darkness takes on a particularly poignant significance. In late December (this year December 21), the sun seems to hover in the sky in its lowest arc of the year. The winter solstice (meaning standing still sun) brings with it the shortest period of daylight during the year and historically has been the most hopeful and conversely the most dreaded time of the year.
Cultures from across the globe watched and recorded the movement of the heavenly bodies to assure they would be prepared for and able to predict the time each year when darkness would appear to rule over light. Humans have struggled with the darkness during the winter months for millennia. Complex and often lengthy rituals were developed to ensure the triumph of light over darkness. To this day the Hopitu Shinumu, or The Peaceful Ones, a native culture from the pacific northwest, practice the Soyal ceremony. The ritual begins on the shortest day of the year and is a time for offering prayers and wishing prosperity and health in the coming year. During the Soyaluna ritual, the most powerful humans of the Hopi, the warriors, intreat the Sun God to turn around and return to the earth. This ritual represents, among other things, the start of another cycle of the wheel of the year and is one of the most important periods of purification. Prior to the Christian era the Roman solar cult had its major festival on the winter solstice, December 25th. This date of the invincible sun was carried into the iconography of Christianity as the birth of Jesus and the story of a brilliant star that lit the sky symbolizing life over death...light over darkness.
Although science has given us a precise and clear way for understanding the decline of the sun during the winter months, light continues to play a significant sub-conscious role for us during December. We continue to mimic age old customs of building bonfires, burning candles and celebrating festivals of light by wrapping our homes in glittering reminders of the transition taking place during this season. The lights of December are an invocation of the coming warmth and brighter skies of Spring. This time of year is a reminder that just as light follows dark, great joy often follows and flows from deep sorrow. Satisfying some primal instinct within each of us, light, the Giver God, brings with it comfort and hope for life’s renewal.

Namaste • John Merideth • Director onlYoga

The Auto Familiar

2007-09-26T10:50:00.000-05:00

The Auto-Familiar
One of the most difficult tasks of teaching a movement based practice like yoga, is getting across to students that they must unmask the assumptions they carry within them around what it means to fully be in their body. Some of the assumptions we use to shape our experience of ourselves are obvious; gender, age, weight, height, etc. Many, many more are far more subtle and often require fairly intense study to uncover. The difficulty is in illuminating how years of conditioned action have brought us to our current level of self-awareness. Movement and posture, not unlike language, can take on a very auto-familiar quality within the closed sphere of our own experience. The range and vocabulary of our movement can feel limited to what we have previously experienced or known. Movement based practices like yoga or dance are in many ways like learning a foreign language. By demanding that we stay present, they dislodge us from our assumptions and quite literally propel us into the possibility of redefinition. From the vantage point of a new vocabulary of movement, we can envision being in our bodies in a fresh way. The known is a powerful and safe place to reside. Stretching beyond our comfort zone into a new vocabulary of experience is how we shake free of the assumed prejudices we hold about ourselves.
“Taken by itself, each language is auto-familiar: it has its own concepts, its own system of thought which, within it, condition the thinkable. The way we think and speak arises out of decisions our language has already made for us: language discreetly dictates to its users - in an invisible manner - self-evident assumptions and proscriptions that are inscribed in its grammar (which is, by definition, imperceptible from inside the language.) In order for grammar to appear as such one must dislodge one's language from its self-presence, from its assumptions and proscriptions, by subjecting them to the otherness of a different grammar, by putting them in question through the medium of a foreign language.”
Felman, Shoshana. Writing and Madness. pp 18-19.

Effortless Effort

2007-09-26T10:48:00.000-05:00

Our ability to see into things, to see the truth, is intrinsic. We can extract happiness and meaning from life despite our awareness of our own mortality. This is a universal quest that crosses time and culture. By practicing yoga we learn to rein in the tendency of consciousness to gravitate toward the impermanence of external things. As consciousness settles, it takes on a transparent quality and our experience of time becomes more spacious and less personal. With more time and space the drama of life becomes less compelling. At this point consciousness begins to experience a less personal way of seeing and a problem emerges. We are faced with a conundrum - the very action and energy propelling us to seek clarity is itself an obstacle on our path. The more force we use, the more it feels like we are doing something. It is at this point that we must develop the ability to rest in the stillness of the moment. However, first we must learn to identify the point of focus. Once we can identify the stillness, we can learn to return to it without exertion. There are many important issues that allow us to reach this juncture but two stand out above the others. The first is motivation or the genuine energy we bring to liberating our mind (effort). The second is intelligent orientation or our willingness to continually place our consciousness before the divine mirror of life (effortless). Motivation requires energy but truly seeing the sublime beauty in a sunset is intrinsically effortless.

John Merideth • Director

The Ineffable

2007-02-23T00:14:00.001-05:00

To great or extreme to be described in words...hmmmm.

Anger...

2006-09-13T09:10:00.001-05:00

The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present.

Barbara De Angelis

Teaching

2006-08-21T22:53:00.001-05:00

It is a challenge teaching...everybody is looking for something
different in their practice. I have to remind myself that all too
often we only see what we are looking for and miss much of what lies
before us. The real practice is in allowing the experience to live
us so that we stop getting in the way.

Love

2006-08-21T22:11:00.001-05:00

Perhaps love is the process of my leading you gently back to yourself
- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Thoreau Quote

2006-07-10T22:38:00.001-05:00

As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler; solitude will not be solitude, poverty will not be poverty, nor weakness weakness.

-Henry David Thoreau

Counsious Evolution

2006-07-01T20:04:00.001-05:00

Counsious Evolution
How can one be totally present and accepting and still strive to be a better person or work on self-improvement? I get this type of question fairly often from students, especially when we are reading some seemingly esoteric text directly and indirectly stating that enlightenment requires complete acceptance of the moment. How can we have a "goal" of reaching higher consciousness while accepting that we're not "there" yet. If we are content to just be, why would we strive for more? Of course, the easy answer is that full acceptance is itself an "end point" of sorts...but such solipsism doesn't usually get me very far in a discussion.
The more difficult answer, and the way that I try to live my life (with varying degrees of success), has to do with what I refer to as placement. Who we think we are and how we define our experience is often relative to culturally dictated data sets that we collect about ourselves, like our weight, our bank balance, job title, status, etc. We use this data stream to compare and contrast our current position with where we have been. Life is "good" as long as we see a positive trend and tends to make us anxious when we notice negative growth. The placement part of this is related to identifying our position, placing our ego, relative to stuff that is in flux, like our bank account, our waist line or our partner, rather than something infinite like universal compassion, pure awareness or non-violence. When we stop tying our sense of self so strongly to culturally predictable normative standards and begin instead to shape our identity around unbounded ideas like pure awareness, our position shifts from the fluctuation of outcome to one anchored in possibility..
For me personally this translates into being a highly motivated, goal oriented, overachiever without loosing sight of what’s really important. In fact, I try to regularly evaluate where I am and reset my intentions to move me toward greater abundance but my sense of who I am or what makes John a “good” person has little to do with external factors. I continually orient myself towards trying without being attached to the outcome. I can continue to strive for greater abundance and new experience, without feeling limited by the results of my endeavors, because I have set my internal awareness towards a concept that is greater than my own limited existence. Working this way offers one the benefit of being proactive without the drawback of self-definition based on accomplishments alone. On a day to day level, I have goals and the pendulum of success swings back and forth but in terms of my life work, my experience transcends these temporary fluctuations.
A mind set like this can take a little getting used to and requires consistent practice in letting go of the linear methodology employed by our woonky culture. Its like arguing gravity is relative. Of course, on earth, gravity isn’t relative but how we frame our relationship to its force in our life is relative. Without gravity we wouldn’t have a down or an up and our placement in space would depend on “choice” rather than assumption (Think The Matrix). For me, regular meditation and LOTS of asana work helps wash away some of life’s inherent habituation, keeping me clear and focused on the big picture...god.
Sadly I have noticed over the last few years that this great practice we call YOGA is itself becoming mired in limited constructs of money, power, fame and status. Instead of practices providing students with a place to land and evolve after hyper scheduled days, I see more and more teachers emphasizing outcome as they take their students through endlessly rehearsed scripts. The result is a strict and mundane kind of experience where students believe yoga = legs behind the head, rather than yoga = liberation from self-limitation. So look for more creativity and less...status quo...from onlYoga in the coming months as the studio continues to evolve consciously.
Sadly I have noticed over the last few years that this great practice we call YOGA is itself becoming mired in limited constructs of money, power, fame and status. Instead of practices providing students with a place to land and evolve after hyper scheduled days, I see more and more teachers emphasizing outcome as they take their students through endlessly rehearsed scripts. The result is a strict and mundane kind of experience where students believe yoga = legs behind the head, rather than yoga = liberation from self-limitation. So look for more creativity and less...status quo...from onlYoga in the coming months as the studio continues to evolve consciously.

Summer Newsletter 2006

Listening - Lesson 1 Subject/Object Relationship

2006-04-29T23:45:00.001-05:00

Acquire an 8.5 x 11” piece of paper and a black writing pen. Draw a line across the page so that your piece of paper is divided into two separate spaces (it doesn't matter where you start or whether it is a vertical or horizontal line as long as it bisects the page). Now draw a circle near but not touching the line (it doesn't matter how large or small the circle is as long as it fits in one of the two spaces on the page). Place the paper in the center of a table that you can walk around. Pick a side and stand facing the drawing. Describe the relationship of the circle to the line. Moving clockwise, walk around the table stopping in turn on each side to describe the relationship of the circle to the line. Continue around the table until you end up where you started. Notice how the relationship of the circle to the line changes. Sometimes the circle will be above the line, sometimes below. Sometimes the circle will be to the left of the line and sometimes to the right. Now ask yourself the following question

“What changed the relationship of the circle to the line?”.
The relationship of subject to object is an artifice of the mind relevant only as long as we insist on maintaining our perspective of up versus down, left versus right, inside versus outside, hot versus cold, black versus white, etc. What does this have to do with anything? Well, as long as we maintain a perspective that places us in opposition to our subject then we are separate from it. Placing ourselves in opposition to our subject makes sense if we are attempting to stay out of the way of the MARTA bus on Peachtree Street but it begins to cause problems when we make ourselves the subject of our inquiry. How can you both be yourself and be separate from yourself simultaneously? How can you be in opposition to you? Trying to hold this kind of mental space is the root of dysfunction. It is easiest for me to conceive of this concept in terms of music. To experience music is not to read notes on a page or say out-loud the words of a song. To experience music is to hear or play or sing the notes and the words, to actively participate in the process of making the musical language into Being. To experience the Self, or to experience God requires the same kind of active participation. God is not a conceit of the mind to be grasped but rather a continual act of non-placement.

Your Greatest Resource

2006-01-31T00:46:00.001-05:00

The tradition of New Year’s is as ancient as civilization itself. In ancient Babylon the turning of the year coincided with mid-March and the transformation of Winter into Spring. In modern times, 153 B.C., we see the figure of Janus (January) a mystical king from early Rome appearing at the head of the calendar. With two faces, Janus could reflect on the past year and consider possibilities of the coming cycle. Janus the god of beginnings and the guardian of thresholds became a symbol for the resolutions we now associate with the holiday. Although the date for New Year’s Day varies in every culture, the theme of celebration and the customs observed to ensure a fulfilling new year are universal.

Reinventing Yourself
New Year’s is the only holiday that celebrates the passage of time. It’s no surprise then that as we explore the last few moments of the year our thoughts can be reflective, even introspective. Inevitably our introspection leads us to consider possible ways we might improve upon our self and our life in the coming year. Thus ensues the annual ritual of making resolutions. New Year’s is a perfect time to begin the process of reinventing ourselves and in the process replace some outdated habits with fresh invigorating new experiences. Approaching the coming year as a painter would undertake a blank canvas, full of creative possibilities, can fill our life with passion fueled by a sense of natural purpose, intention and hope.
Maintaining Your Momentum
While we may start the year with great intentions for forging ahead in the most positive way possible, come mid-February we are often faced with the shocking reality that staying healthy, happy and successful is hard work. So what do we do when we start to feel the momentum and excitement of those “new” resolutions fade? What can we do to reinvigorate our commitment and make sure we stay on course for the year? Below are some simple strategies for ensuring that this year’s resolutions don’t turn into next year’s anxiety.

1. Make a plan. Break it down. What are the top five things you need to do in order to keep your resolutions rolling? What adjustments, both long-term and short-term, will need to be made in order to achieve your goal(s)?
2. Stop punishing yourself for “bad” behavior. If you get off track don’t waste time wallowing in your own vomit. Keep the self flagellations to a minimum and simply get back on track! Guilt and shame can be short term motivators but ultimately serve only to reinforce what we already know about ourselves.
3. Make the time. This is one of the biggest road blocks to success. You have to carve out the time you need to work on yourself. This should be a no-brainer given that you are your greatest resource.
4. Don’t try to save the world tomorrow. Pick realistic manageable goals that can be achieved over the short and long-term. Picking impossible goals can be a great excuse to fail. Multiple smaller successes can be just as powerful as one large achievement.
5. Motivation, motivation, motivation. Write it down. Talk about it to your friends, partner, family. Motivation keeps us clear and honest during those murky times when that extra piece of chocolate cake is calling or when we think we are just too busy to make it to class. Motivation is not static so what motivates you today may be different next week or next month. Be prepared to adapt your motivation to suit changes in your lifestyle and attitude over the course of the year. Motivation keeps our commitments fresh and invigorating!
Now then, go out there and conquer the world! Happy New Year!

2005-12-09T16:34:00.000-05:00

There is within each breath a simultaneous fear of...

2005-11-18T15:42:00.000-05:00

There is within each breath a simultaneous fear of both flying and falling. Experiencing the freedom of one requires the fortitude of the other. The battle rages and the feather floats.

I am traveling in some vehicle, I am sitting in so...

2005-11-18T00:53:00.000-05:00

I am traveling in some vehicle, I am sitting in some cafe.
A defector from the petty wars until love sucks me back that way.

-Joni Mitchell

fire escape

2005-11-18T00:51:00.000-05:00

fire escape

Essence

2005-09-29T23:47:00.001-05:00

The essence of life is the bitter/sweet nectar of emptiness.
Our struggle to fill the emptiness is the root of our suffering and discontent. The meaning of life are the words themselves. And yet the meaning of a thing is not its name. Living motivation stems from the flowering of curiosity, rooted in direct observation. Ambivalence is the terminal by-product of self-delusion. The purpose of living is to express the ever more subtle metaphor of existence. Conversely life has no purpose without the creative act. Fear is a shadow cast by an imaginary being. To Love you must surrender to yourself and die a little bit everyday.

The Struggle

2005-06-29T23:48:00.000-05:00

Nothingness: nonexistence, empty space, a void...

For everyone there is a certain amount of struggle involved in living life. We all struggle at different times with issues like relationships, money, family, career, loss, addiction, health, love, etc. Often our life struggles are paralleled by resistance on our mat. In our practice, the struggle shows up first as tightness or generalized fatigue in our muscles. As we deepen our practice we notice that the feeling of physical resistance is purely a symptom of mental distraction and inner contraction. If we pause here and look closely we see that our struggle stems from some outdated mental form used to prop up our ego...

During particularly intense periods of resistance and struggle in my own life, I have had glimpses of what lies behind the difficulty in letting go of rigidity and learning to loosen up. (I can think back to being a small child and wandering off from my mother through the clothes racks at the mall. Upon realizing that I had lost her, the department store that seemed so pleasantly stimulating just moments before, suddenly became ominous and intimidating.) Letting go can feel very much like being lost or disappearing. In the space of a heart beats brief life, as we loosen our grip on security, an awareness of panic often floods our senses. The physical or mental act of letting go releases an emotional wave carrying within it the energy we were using to hold on. At the apex of the wave our consciousness is subsumed by a more instinctual part of our brain formulated around our drive to survive. Like a falling leaf, we become displaced from all that seemed cozy and familiar. For just a moment, as we stop controlling the forces around us, we disappear into the chaos of unfamiliar territory. Our dislocation, even if only an instant, is like a miniature death for our ego...
So the struggle is always about trying to maintain or extend some false sense of security we are attempting to carry with us into the present. Even if the security we cling to is obviously self-limiting, it’s difficult for us to believe that it will be replaced by something else, often something more fulfilling. In this light the assertion, made by Patanjali in the Yoga Sutras, that ignorance is the greatest hindrance to enlightenment could’t be more compelling. It takes a great deal of courage and insight to even acknowledge that we are clinging and even more to choose to release our attachment.
Over the years I have learned to welcome the intensity that comes with a good struggle because, in Pema Chodron’s words, “to lead a more passionate, full, and delightful life...we must realize that we can endure a lot of pain and pleasure for the sake of finding out who we are and what this world is, how we tick and how our world ticks, how the whole thing just is. If we are committed to comfort at any cost, as soon as we come up against the least edge of pain, we’re going to run; we’ll never know what’s beyond that particular barrier or wall or fearful thing.”
from Pema Chodron from The Wisdom Of No Escape

Svadhyaya

2005-03-31T00:49:00.001-05:00

Yoga can be an extraordinary tool for bringing into focus and then harnessing the fundamental energies and themes of one’s life experience. Whether we like it or not the clarity revealed while practicing is not limited to the time spent on the mat. In fact, the longer we practice the more we discover our yoga is permeating and effecting all aspects of our life – from the food we choose to eat, right up to our concept of god. This is a “good” thing right…because we are “growing”? Ultimately I believe the process of self examination we undertake by consistently returning to our mat day after day, season after season, year after year is very productive and part of evolving spiritually. However, the process certainly doesn't always feel good – nor should it necessarily. Whether you are sitting quietly in meditation or vigorously projecting yourself through the primary series, yoga acts as a mirror. If we are practicing mindfully then yoga directly reflects back to us our mental, emotional and physical state. If we are agitated then the agitation undoubtedly shows up in our practice. If we are moving through a period of grief in our life, then the heaviness of the grief may present itself to us as we meditate. If we are feeling unfettered or successful then our asana practice may feel equally light and free. Any time you make the effort to see yourself clearly there is the possibility that you will see/experience/discover something uncomfortable. If you practice yoga long enough you will find awkward periods, sad periods, strong periods… The 90 minutes spent on the mat is like concentrated me time – time to decompress. It is a bit naive to believe that the practice is only going to reveal our physical tangles.
This idea of self-exploration or self-study is know as Svadhyaya and is one of the Niyamas (the second limb of Ashtanga yoga relating to internal discipline). I was trained to see yoga in general as a tool for gaining knowledge of the self. In my own life I have found when I consciously engage in Svadhyaya and own it as part of my practice, the opportunity for transformation is amplified. One of the incredible powers of Svadhyaya is its power to reveal the story lines we use to perpetuate our own inner drama. For example believing we are too old, weak, inflexible, overweight, poor, etc., to execute this challenging practice. When the story lines finally drop away (when we stick around long enough and are consistent in our practice) we discover the ability to be was there all along!

Being Blank

2005-01-31T00:51:00.001-05:00

blank adj : complete or absolute
blank n : a complete absence of awareness or memory
As I was putting this newsletter together, I endeavored to write something eloquent and poignant to include. I made several attempts, all of which felt forced. Nothing was taking form except a fair amount of blankness. Initially my lack of inspiration was irritating. I felt uninspired and voiceless. These feelings spawned doubt, which crept in (just for a second) and I thought, "What kind of teacher am I? Creativity can be daunting. As a painter, I remember numerous hours spent blankly staring at pristine white canvases fighting off an overwhelming sense of urgency to find my voice. All in all a rather disconcerting experience...or is it? After overcoming my deer in the headlights neurosis, I began to reflect on the blankness I was feeling. I came to the conclusion that blankness is much like space. Space has a liberating quality to it that can create emphasis. Life tends to get all jumbled together and confused without space. Look at these words for example, without space they becomesvirtuallyunintelligible. So instead of trying to fill the blankness and force it to become something, I tried to relax into it. I was almost immediately reminded of the tiny little opening, between the inhalation and the exhalation. There is no action in that space, I mean you are neither inhaling nor exhaling - it's a neutral space or a blank space. The emptiness between the cycles of the breath couldn't be more important. That little pause or space sets in motion the meter of our life...moment after moment, day after day and year after year. Suddenly my blankness was feeling significant, even precious and definitely not disconcerting. Of course the thrilling aspect of emptiness is the potential it holds for what lies ahead...in that next breath. There is also such freedom in letting go enough to find the spaces between the end of one action and the beginning of another. O yeah, ashtanga yoga is about finding the "blank" spaces as well. The asanas act as resting spaces within the rhythmic dance of vinyasa. The static nature of the postures, give the mind/body space to open into. Perhaps being blank isn't such a terrible thing. In fact maybe blankness is even a desirable quality. In closing, as Rumi so often entreats, become a lover and allow duty to be transformed into inspiration...in those spaces practice is transformed into vivid wind song gently propelling you onward.

Refining Elegance

2004-09-29T23:51:00.001-05:00

Elegance and grace are essentially refined expressions of poise. Poise referring not to rigidity or contrived expression but rather a state of balanced suspension where one hovers in delighted anticipation. Fundamental to yoga, poise dictates the skill with which we negotiate the forces at play in our minds and our bodies. The grace and poise of fluid movement, vinyasa, is derived from a deep sense of joy and wonder. We are most buoyant when we delight in the joy of being and cultivate a sense of inquisitive wonder. To locate joy in our practice and our life we must learn to continually let go. It’s in clinging or holding that we loose our buoyancy. Primarily we are learning to let go of fear and aggression. So we are learning to promote fearlessness and non-aggression. Fear and aggression are limited constructs of the mind. They are limited because their power is dependent on direct or latent reactions to external objects. Joy, delight and wonder, on the other hand, are dependent only on willingness. Chiefly its a willingness to consistently, honestly and gently step into the immediacy of experience. By willingly engaging in an experience without fear or aggression we are making a subtle statement to ourselves about how we choose to be in the world. This subtle statement sets in motion an internal stillness that brings with it the elegance and grace, the poise of un-self-conscious expression.

“ Then we can move freely around our world without trying to change it particularly, but just expressing what needs to be expressed or uncovering what needs to be uncovered by means of our art.” Chogyam Trungpa

The principle of cultivating poise sounds beautiful and facile. However, I believe actualizing poise in ones life and practice is perhaps not as simple as it sounds. The difficulty is in beginning where we are with what we have and then not becoming complacent as we learn to refine our expression. Starting something requires that we bravely walk into a new experience...this is fearlessness. Maintaining effort over time means that we lightheartedly remain open to the possibility of starting something new with each breath...this is non-aggression. Every moment is a new space in which to explore.

Antaranga

2004-06-29T23:52:00.001-05:00

The three internal limbs of Ashtanga Yoga.
According to Patanjali, the author of the yoga sutras, thoughts come in three primary forms. The first form is sense based thought, driven by our involvement with the world around us. The second form is memory or residual impressions left over from past experience. The last variety of thought stems from projection or anticipation of future events. To survive over the millennia, the mind has developed into a tool for processing information (actually some biologist now believe our current level of intelligence may be directly related to our need to conceptualize and utilize language on both individual and cultural levels). We sense information, make associations and distinctions…eventually drawing conclusions. The mind operates in dualities. Deconstructing, it separates dark from light, regular from irregular, me from you. The mind can become confused or deluded by a feedback loop stemming from dualistic thought. Herein lies the limitation of our thoughts. Very simply, we can get stuck in only seeing how things are separate because the mind is structured to conceptualize along these lines. We fall into a way of thinking…this is our nature. Unfortunately, when thoughts run wild and uncontrolled they can mislead or confuse us. The confusion of the mind can keep us from seeing the truth about a situation or more importantly ourselves and ultimately can leave us feeling despondent.
Patanjali tells us that the antaranga or the final three limbs of astanga yoga are ultimately a means for overcoming the dualism of the mind. Pranayama, breath control, is the first step in understanding and controlling the nature of our thoughts. During pranayama we close our eyes, listen to the sound of the breath and feel the texture of the breath in our body. We begin to turn our attention inward thereby reducing external sense impressions or thoughts. By gently turning our attention inward to something going on inside us physically, we cut back the amount of energy we are giving to outside stimuli.
The process of looking within and pulling our attention to an internal physical sensation brings us to pratyahara. The final expression of pratyahara is complete sense withdrawal. Withdrawal does not mean escape or abandonment of the world but rather a break or vacation from outer stimuli. During pratyahara the push and pull of dualistic thinking diminishes and we stop jumping from one thing to the next. As we grow more comfortable with the process a new awareness emerges and our inner voice becomes clearer.
The process of learning to maintain sense withdrawal is dharana – the first of the three final limbs. Dharana is also known as concentration. Through sustained dharana we move toward dhayna or meditation – the second of the three limbs.

In meditation we learn to continually direct our mind toward a single object such as the breath. This form of sustained concentration eventually enables us to separate the material aspect of the object and its label from the essence of the object itself. I find it useful to think of meditation in terms of music. It’s akin to hearing only the flute sound while listening to a symphony. A meditation technique is the means to get from many to one or to go from a state of unrest to a state of tranquility. It’s important to understand that a meditation technique takes you there but is not the ultimate state of equipoise. Too often we loose ourselves in technique forgetting the purpose behind our effort.
The final limb of ashtanga yoga is Samadhi during which the subject and object cease to be separate. At this point we step gently into a place where we are able to let go of the I’ness we carry with us. As our individuality fades away, the light of the object alone, the edge between form and formlessness, fills the awareness. The distinctions of the mind cease to be.
I know what you’re thinking, ”What does this have to do with my asana practice?” The depth of our asana practice, the amount of prana or energy we are able to tap into, is directly related to how inwardly focused we stay during our practice. Every posture has at its root the final three limbs of Ashtanga yoga. In order to find the full expression of a posture, you must still your mind sufficiently, allow the light between effort and relaxation to wash over you and fall into equipoise.

Jump Out Of The Fire

2004-03-31T00:54:00.001-05:00

I sit, legs crossed in front of me, concentrating on not concentrating, un-focusing awareness into the energy that is my body...into the heart space. As I watch, extraordinary, illusory images flow before my mind. My breath takes me deeper until mass/matter dissolve into infinite space and I am filled with an extraordinary vibration. I am awake.

The first time I remember awakening to this state of consciousness, I had been practicing Yoga, focusing on breathing alone - watching Prana (life/breath) ignite the energy centers of my being. I was simply pulling oxygen into my body, but for the first time I realized the significance this unconscious biological process holds. The rhythmic inhalation/ exhalation, inhalation/ exhalation was the most pervasive contact I had with the world outside of my being. Breath was providing the means for a symbiosis between existence and awareness...the inner and the outer. Each breath bathed my being with atoms of oxygen, thereby fueling the chemical reactions taking place in every cell in my body. Prana, breath, energy, air, matter was being pulled in, incorporated, exchanged and then expelled. Suddenly I knew myself, my Being, to be the energy that surrounded me.
These tiny atomic particles of energy are everywhere in our world, they are our world, we are built of them; all creatures and plants, all thoughts and actions, every thing has as its basis these transmutable particles of energy. This is a seeing or knowing without recognizing or making life something outside of the Self...a recognition of self creation...a death of the limited ego mind. Consciousness becomes rhythmic breath, a wave of ever expanding energy - undifferentiated - allowing the 'inner' and 'outer' worlds to mix on an emotional, conceptual level.
In this way, through the breath, everything conceived has vital manifestation as world energy. With these thoughts divisive matters of difference begin to dissolve and the possibilities for becoming in fullness, for living dynamically through the manifest energies about one can be realized. This knowing, that I am breath and that breath is energy and that energy is what propels all things into being, is the eternal aspect in all being; it is true, timeless history, it is Divinity. In this way everything all the time is causing everything else ( and so each thing can offer itself as an image of this constant Divine state.)
"Whenever anything is experienced simply in and for and as itself, without reference to any concepts, relevancies, or practical relationships, such a moment of sheer aesthetic arrest throws the viewer back for an instant upon his own existence with out meaning; for he too simply is - "thus Come" a vehicle for consciousness, like a spark flung out from a fire " (Campbell, Joseph. Myths to Live By. The Viking Press, New York, 1972.p 137.)

AUM

2003-07-30T23:56:00.001-05:00

According to the traditions of Hinduism, out of which yoga took form, we exist in one of three states of consciousness at all times. The objective reality we all share and try to agree upon is the first state of awareness, its called jagrat. This waking state is identified with the limited concerns of the ego and its particular time and space. While in the jagrat state we are drowning in that which we seek, deluded by the very fabric of experience. Once asleep we begin to dream and enter the second state of consciousness called swapa. In dreams we continue to delude ourselves through attachments the ego has to the world, however, our experience becomes ours alone. The subjective nature of swapa can result in time and space becoming vague or warped. Beyond dreams we enter a deep state of awareness called sushupti. As we pass into unconsciousness we loose all identification with the ego and thus all reference to time and space slips away. While in sushupti, we flow into the eternal nature of the universe...then the alarm goes off, we hit the snooze button and the whole process starts anew. You might liken yoga to the lenses in eyeglasses. Yoga focuses or intensifies the energies of our life, thereby clarifying our attachments. With sustained practice yoga can take us to the fourth state of consciousness called turiya. Here we wake up to the eternal nature of the universe and begin to experience the bliss of samadhi moving beyond attachment.

Interestingly, the various states of awareness are part and parcel of the symbol and sound of Om (AUM). A represents jagrat, U invokes swapa, M symbolizes sushupti and the resonating vibration turiya. By chanting Om we make audible the very thing we seek.

Pattabhi Jois in San Francisco...

2003-07-30T23:55:00.001-05:00

Many of you have asked me about my experience with Guruji while I was in San Francisco, so I thought I would share some of my impressions with you.
Each morning I awoke at 4:45am and traveled into downtown San Francisco. I stood in line outside the Regency building waiting for a space for my mat in the crowded room within. I was one of more than 300 practioners in the first class. Space was at a premium...we were told not to stagger our mats. I was kicked as people rolled back in chakrasana and hit as people reached up in Virabadrasana 1. The first day was the hardest...it was easy to allow my mind to be distracted by so many people and hard to understand Guruji’s thick Indian accent. However, I had tears of gratitude in my eyes after that first day.
I have practiced Ashtanga yoga nearly half of my life and in that time worked with countless teachers. Practicing with Guruji was like returning home after a long trip...both familiar and soothingly comfortable. He was tough! His approach while confrontational was non-aggressive and reminded me a great deal of my own teaching style. I was struck by the direct nature of his teaching...unfettered by his individuality, it harkened to a much greater experience. For me the experience was like tuning a guitar and Guruji was the perfect pitch.
Finally, I was grateful for having been taught such a dynamic practice. Ashtanga yoga teaches us directly that liberation does not come looking for us. We must consistently make the effort to seek it out...it is in the seeking that we find freedom from our limitations.